The Care and Feeding of Ryan Atwood for Dummies
by Helen C
Summary: Four cool things Seth did for Ryan.
1. Part 1

**Title** : The Care and Feeding of Ryan Atwood for Dummies

**Author** : Helen C.

**Rating** : G

**Summary **: Four cool things Seth did for Ryan.

**Disclaimer** : The characters and the universe were created and are owned by Josh Schwartz. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

**AN**. Some of it is just venting, some of it is because Seth can be nice and attentive too. Yes, he can.

Many thanks to joey, who beta'd this.

* * *

**The Care and Feeding of Ryan Atwood for Dummies**

Helen C.

Part One

Before Ryan arrived in Newport, Seth didn't think of himself as a spoiled kid.

Sure, he was used to getting pretty much everything he asked for, but since his parents made him live in this hellhole they called home, it was the least they could do, wasn't it? With the jocks making his life hell and the girl of his dreams totally ignoring him, he figured he was more than entitled to a little compensation.

Besides, he didn't get absolutely everything he wanted. He had asked his parents for permission to enroll in another school countless times (after the jocks had thrown his clothes in the toilet during PE, after they had put shaving cream in his locker, and after they had threatened to throw him out of the locker room with only a towel wrapped around his waist, for example). But his parents held firm in their belief that Harbor was better than any other school, no matter what.

So, compared to the rest of the Newport kids, life wasn't easy for Seth Cohen, comic book nerd.

Then he met Ryan, a kid his age who'd had a life Seth couldn't even begin to imagine. He had always known that people like Ryan and his family existed—because of TV, and because his rich family and their even wealthier friends threw fundraisers several times a month to help such people. But until he got to know Ryan, the knowledge had remained theoretical. Poor people existed, domestic violence existed, but it all happened so far from his home that it might as well have happened on another planet.

Oh, of course, the words "domestic abuse" weren't mentioned when talking about Ryan, at least not when Seth was within earshot. Ryan himself never said much about his life in Chino. A few things slipped here and there—sobering glimpses into another world, that made Seth uneasy and wary of saying the wrong thing.

Seth's parents didn't say much either; they merely explained that Ryan had had a rough life and could use a break, and that Seth wasn't to broach the subject with Ryan unless Ryan started the discussion.

Seth wasn't stupid, though.

He could read between the lines and he could see that a mother who coldly abandoned her child hadn't become dysfunctional only recently. It was clear that the trouble in the Atwood household had certainly started a long time ago.

So, yes, compared to Ryan's life in Chino, Seth's life had been a bed of roses—not easy, but certainly not as bad as drunken mothers who allowed their boyfriends to deal drugs from their living rooms.

He had, indeed, maybe, if he looked at it with this new hindsight, been spoiled and sheltered in many ways. And it was entirely possible that he had grown up to become a whiny, self-centered kid, as he discovered once the honeymoon was over, when the changes Ryan had brought in the family dynamics started to make themselves known.

Seth had always wanted a sibling—at first, when he was young, he wanted a kid brother, someone he could impart wisdom on. Later, as years went by and he grew more lonely, he became less picky. Boy or girl, anyone would do, just as long as he wasn't an only child anymore.

He hadn't considered the changes someone else would bring to his life.

He hadn't considered that his parents would need to split their attention between two kids, would have less time to sympathize with his problems, would need a lot of time at first to deal with the new kid. The fact that "the new kid" was a self-sufficient teenager didn't change the equation. Seth's parents needed to get to know him, needed to get clothes and furniture and supplies for him, needed to make a place for him into their lives.

At first, it didn't bother Seth. Having a friend he could call a brother without being cheesy or wildly off-base was everything he had ever dreamed of and his parents were granting him more freedom than before since they needed to make sure Ryan got used to his new house. Not having overbearing parents to worry about was always a plus for a teenager.

But having to share his parents with someone else also meant that they would have less time to listen to his complaints and to help him fix his problems. It became clear shortly after school started. Seth wanted to complain about the creative writing teacher who had hated what he had turned in and had asked him to do it again. Unfortunately, his parents noticed that Ryan was even more subdued than usual, and spent all dinner grilling him for information, eventually dragging out of Ryan that he felt seriously overwhelmed and was rethinking going to Harbor.

Seth didn't begrudge Ryan for feeling out of his depth (did cultural shock apply since Ryan was still living in the US? Or was there any other way to put what Ryan was going through?) He just wished his parents had some time for him too.

He should have seen it coming. Having another teenager in the house, and one who had issues, and trust problems, and who needed to be reassured and guided in many subtle ways, was bound to change a lot of things.

But while he wouldn't have admitted it to anyone, not even to Captain Oats, to himself, Seth had to admit that deep, deep down he was a little resentful.

It wasn't jealousy.

It was just that taking Ryan in had changed things in ways Seth hadn't anticipated.

After everything he had been through, Ryan deserved parents who gave him their undivided attention.

It wasn't jealousy.

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To Seth's credit, the feeling of being left out didn't last long.

There were several moments when he felt a slight flash of non-jealousy twist his guts, but he never allowed himself to dwell on it (being self-centered was one thing, acting like it was something else entirely).

And then, about two weeks after Ryan had admitted to feeling a little overwhelmed, Seth started to notice that the pool house light stayed on very late at night. He studied Ryan's shadow through the blinds for a few days (maybe he was just working? Trying to stay afloat in Harbor could be challenging) and came to the conclusion that his friends spent most of his time sitting with his head in his hands, or sometimes pacing.

The light stayed on increasingly late during the following week, until it reached the point where it never went off.

Seth tried to talk about it with Ryan, who shrugged off his concern and said he had too much work to do and was too keyed up to sleep.

His mom tried to talk about it with Ryan, who smiled unconvincingly and said he was fine, just a little worked up and he'd shut off the lights if it bothered them.

His dad tried to talk about it with Ryan. Ryan looked down and mumbled an apology, saying he hadn't meant to worry anyone.

Seth started to worry, and if the hushed conversations his parents had whenever Ryan wasn't around were any indication, so did they.

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The light stayed on at night in the pool house for another week.

The circles under Ryan's eyes deepened.

Seth's parents looked increasingly worried and tired.

Seth himself was growing frantic—what if Ryan had serious problems? Would he tell them? Did he trust them enough to confide in them at this point? Should they push him to talk or wait for him to come find them? Did his parents have a clue, or were they as lost as Seth was?

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Things finally came to a head on Friday night.

The pool house lights were on, and around one in the morning, the quiet of the night was broken by Ryan's yelling—something about Dawn, and AJ, and fuck was she ever going to change, and shit, don't call back. Ever.

All three Cohens gathered in the kitchen, exchanging worried glances as Ryan paced the short distance between the pool house and the kitchen, holding the phone to his ear.

Seth's dad sighed and joined Ryan near the pool, approaching carefully as Ryan paced, holding the phone tightly enough to break it. He had stopped yelling but from the way his chest heaved, he obviously didn't like what he was hearing.

Ryan looked up when he saw someone approaching him and he dropped the phone as if he had been burned. From the kitchen, Seth watched his dad get even closer to Ryan and put an arm on his shoulder while Ryan talked (was he apologizing? He apologized all the time). He couldn't make out what was being said, and he wasn't sure he wanted to know.

Ryan dropped to the ground, sitting cross-legged on the cold tiles, shoulders hunched.

Sandy picked up the phone and put it to his ear, then set it back on the ground and crouched next to Ryan.

"Maybe he went out on purpose," Seth's mom said, as if talking to herself. "Maybe it was his way of calling us for help. He had to know we'd hear him."

Or maybe Ryan had just been tired and angry enough that he had forgotten they were there. Still, his mother was right. Maybe it was a step in the right direction.

And while there wasn't much Seth could do to help Ryan deal with his past, if sharing his parents helped, then he would gladly do so.

It was, after all, the least he could do.

Watching on as Ryan leaned into Seth's father for support, Seth thought that it might be a small thing, but it was at least a start.


	2. Part 2

**Title** : The Care and Feeding of Ryan Atwood for Dummies

**Author** : Helen C.

**Rating** : G

**Summary** : Four cool things Seth did for Ryan.

**Disclaimer** : The characters and the universe were created and are owned by Josh Schwartz. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

**AN.** Some of it is just venting, some of it is because Seth can be nice and attentive too. Yes, he can.

Many thanks to joey, who beta'd this.

* * *

Part Two

"So, I'm a sucky friend," Seth said, barging into the pool house without knocking, in typical Seth fashion.

Ryan, still buried under the covers, groaned in both acknowledgment and approval.

When he woke Ryan up before the sun had even risen, Seth was a very sucky friend indeed.

"No, no, I know I am."

Ryan raised his head by a few inches. "I never pretended otherwise," he said, his voice still hoarse from sleep.

"Ha ha, very funny." Seth paced the room, making Ryan dizzy, so he buried under the covers once more and tried to tune out Seth.

Maybe if he ignored him long enough, Seth would just shut up and go away?

"Seriously, though."

It didn't work so well. Ryan kept hoping that one day, Seth would take the hint and leave, but so far, about eighteen months into their friendship, the strategy hadn't had any noticeable effect.

"I mean, you get dumped by your first—and only—serious girlfriend this side of Marissa, and what do I do? I drag you to the mall. I can't believe I took my buddy to the mall. Wait. Do I sound gay right now?"

"No, you sound homophobic," Ryan deadpanned, wondering what it would take to shut Seth up.

Duct tape?

Nah, too conventional.

Bronchitis?

According to Sandy, that barely slowed him down.

A nice swift kick up the…

Hm, probably too violent.

Shit.

"Wow, Ryan, two jokes in under five minutes, I'm impressed. But to get back to the issue at hand, what I did may not have been the best way to make you forget about Lindsay, even though it did get Marissa and you in the same tent—and I'll be wanting more details on that later, by the way."

"Seth, what do you want?" Ryan asked as Seth paused to catch his breath—and probably to prepare his next tirade.

Seth sobered up and looked at Ryan. "I want to let you know that I'm here for you."

"You said that already," Ryan replied, trying to muster all the enthusiasm he could.

Which wasn't much.

He hadn't minded going to the mall with his friends. It had seemed like a good idea at the time—no matter what, a mall would never bring back memories of Lindsay.

But then, he had come home and it had all come crashing down on him.

He got that Lindsay had to try and work things out with her mother, and lord knew he understood why she wanted to be very far away from Caleb, but it didn't change the fact that he had been left behind.

Again.

Damn story of his life, and in hindsight, yeah, a trip to the mall was never going to make things better.

He appreciated his friend's offers to help, but he felt down right now, and he didn't think anything would change that.

"I did say it, and I didn't follow through. I'm sorry." Seth flopped on a chair and looked at Ryan. "But I'm here now. Or, you know, later if that's what you want. Later works too. When you feel like it, I shall listen and advise. And yeah, I should probably shut up now and let you, you know, talk."

Ryan would have smiled, if it hadn't been five in the morning. "Now? Not gonna happen." He lay back down resolutely, turning his head away from Seth.

"Ah, yes, the unwritten Atwood rule. The one that states that before seven is no time to talk. I remember that one."

"Good," Ryan said, his voice muffled by the pillow.

"But later… If you want to talk to me later, buddy, I'll be here, at your service."

Ryan let out a groan.

Seth, amazingly, took his cue to leave.

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Three hours later, once Ryan had showered and eaten and was feeling coherent again, Seth was waiting for him, a PS controller in hand.

Ready to listen to Ryan if he wished to talk.

Which he did.


	3. Part 3

**Title** : The Care and Feeding of Ryan Atwood for Dummies

**Author** : Helen C.

**Rating** : G

**Summary** : Four cool things Seth did for Ryan.

**Disclaimer** : The characters and the universe were created and are owned by Josh Schwartz. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

Many thanks to joey, who beta'd this.

* * *

**Part Three**

"You're an idiot," Sadie told Seth.

She didn't even look angry at him, or annoyed, or anything but sure of what she said.

"Huh?" was all Seth could answer. Because, well, huh?

Not exactly the kind of warm welcome he had expected from his kind-of-brother's new kind-of-girlfriend when he had asked her if she'd enjoyed the birthday party.

Her lips twisted in a slight grimace. "Yeah, Seth, it was a nice party. I loved how you all told Ryan he didn't have any friends, I loved how you invited people he didn't even know to his own party—people who couldn't even bother to be polite with him—and I loved how you couldn't even hire a band to play something more to _his _taste."

"He enjoyed himself," Seth tried to defend himself. "Well, as much as usually does when there are people around."

"He was being polite," she retorted. Her tone was definitely growing cold. "Which is a lot more than you deserved after deliberately going against his wishes and embarrassing him at every turn. I've known him for only a few weeks and even I know he hated it and just pretended for your sake. He may be too nice to tell you so, but I'm not." She threw him a disdainful look—the kind of look that made him want to be swallowed by a hole—and snapped, "Buy a clue," walking away and leaving him standing there, stunned.

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Ryan was sitting on his bed, reading a letter, when Seth came in.

He looked a little sad and more than a little tired, leading Seth to wonder whether he had gotten any sleep at all. Ryan sure didn't look like someone who had just celebrated his birthday in style.

"Hey," Seth said.

"Hey," Ryan replied, tearing his eyes away from the letter.

"Nice party last night, huh?" Seth said.

"Yeah." Ryan threw him a quick smile. His thanks-for-the-lunch-money smile.

His thanks-for-the-car-keys smile.

Not his thanks-for-caring smile.

Then he looked down at the letter again.

Seth swallowed back a grimace.

Okay.

He was big enough to admit it.

He had blown it.

It had seemed funny to tease Ryan about his lack of friends and about his lack of social skills, because frankly, Ryan had always cultivated this aura of not caring about things like having a large group of friends. Now, it didn't seem nearly as amusing anymore.

Ryan hadn't had that many requests.

A quiet meal with his family and maybe a movie or two.

And no Newpsie party.

Seth left the pool house unnoticed, feeling worse than he had in a while.

Maybe telling Ryan that he had invited two homeless guys to fill the room with bodies because he didn't have any friends had been tasteless.

Actually, scratch the "maybe."

He needed to make amends.

He needed a grand gesture to lift Ryan's spirit.

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"This is Ryan we're talking about," Summer pointed out when Seth talked to her later that day. "Wouldn't something not 'grand' be more appropriate?"

Summer was very smart.

She had the SATs to prove it.

She had even saved Chrismukkah.

So, Seth listened to her.

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It wasn't so hard to convince his parents to clear a date on their schedules.

His mother always liked family time and parties (even small ones).

His father didn't like big, crowded parties any more than Ryan did, so he was more than ready to offer him some family time as well.

"Good boy," Summer said when Seth invited her to the party.

Sadie didn't call him an idiot when Seth invited her, so he took it as a good sign.

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The six of them had a quiet meal (Thai food, since Ryan had grown addicted to it during his early days in Newport, followed by a cake, because there hadn't been any at the big party).

Then, they watched that shark movie they should have gone to, more than two years earlier—they didn't say anything aloud, but Seth caught Ryan's smile when he put the disk in the DVD player.

When Ryan thanked them before driving Sadie home, he definitely had his, "Thanks for caring" smile.

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"See, sometimes, less is more, Cohen," Summer said before leaving.

He wasn't about to argue with his smart girlfriend.

* * *

TBC 


	4. Part 4

**Title** : The Care and Feeding of Ryan Atwood for Dummies

**Author** : Helen C.

**Rating** : G

**Summary** : Four cool things Seth did for Ryan.

**Disclaimer** : The characters and the universe were created and are owned by Josh Schwartz. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

Many thanks to joey, who beta'd this.

* * *

Part Four

"I'm not letting you anywhere near Ryan in that kind of state." Seth's voice was firm, despite the fact that he must be nervous as hell—who wouldn't be, when faced with a drunk Dawn?

Of all the times for her to relapse, this just had to be the worst, Ryan thought glumly.

He tried to ignore what was happening outside, but some kind of morbid curiosity made him want to know how that particular drama was going to end.

Seth was standing at the door of the pool house, blocking Dawn's passage, as if the door hadn't been locked since Ryan had come home from the hospital, as if he had to add another barrier between Ryan and his mother.

Ryan couldn't make out Dawn's words, but Seth's reply was loud enough for him to hear. "No! You're not talking to him today. He doesn't need that."

Ryan half expected wails, tears, anger, recriminations.

He didn't get it.

Instead, he got Dawn talking very low to Seth, and Seth nodding, lips pinched in a very un-Seth fashion.

Ryan tuned them both out and fell back on his bed, staring at the ceiling.

The Cohens had left half an hour ago to help Julie set up for the funeral, leaving Ryan and Seth alone for a while.

Ryan didn't doubt that they would be back soon, and that they would talk to him again about going. They would certainly have very good, convincing arguments.

Not that it mattered.

Ryan had already said his goodbyes to Marissa. He didn't see what attending a funeral would do for him. Besides, he had no intention of allowing the Newpsies to look at him compassionately, to withstand the whispers and the pitying looks.

_Stay. Don't leave._

His fists clenched of their own accord.

He heard a discreet knock and looked up.

Dawn was retreating to the main house, and Seth was peering in. He gestured to the lock, his meaning clear.

"Come on, man. Let me in," he mouthed.

Ryan sank back to the bed, ignoring the way Seth's face fell.

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As he had predicted, the Cohens tried to get him out of the pool house another two times before leaving for the church.

"You need to say goodbye, kid," Sandy said.

"It might help," Kirsten added.

Seth didn't say anything, but when the Cohens finally left and Ryan looked out, he spotted Seth leaning on the closed pool house door, legs outstretched, talking on his phone.

Seth didn't move from his spot for the rest of the morning.

Neither did Ryan.

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Seth didn't ask stupid questions when, late that night, Ryan unlocked the door and started packing.

He entered and sat on the bed, watching Ryan throw clothes and toiletries in his bag.

He didn't babble, he didn't offer meaningless promises of better days to come, he didn't plead with Ryan to stay.

He didn't yell at Ryan and accuse him of running away from his problems.

Again.

Maybe he already knew that Ryan was well aware of what he was doing, and wasn't proud of it, but that it was the only way he was going to survive the next few days (to say nothing about the rest of his life).

If he had to spend more time in this room, or even in the rest of the house, where Marissa had left a mark everywhere, he was never going to be able to start thinking again, never going to be able to deal with that kind of hurt.

He had to leave the remnants of his old life behind him. Maybe that way, he'd be able to start a new one.

Eventually.

When Ryan slowed his frantic packing, Seth asked, "Is there anything I can say to get you to stay?" his tone indicating that he knew the answer to that one.

"No."

Ryan sat next to Seth, his bag ready. "Tell your parents not to worry. I'll call once I've found somewhere to crash."

"I have money," Seth offered.

Ryan shook his head, studiously avoiding Seth's eyes.

They stayed silent for a while.

"What did Dawn tell you?" Ryan asked eventually, hating that he wanted to know.

Seth's hesitation was barely noticeable. "She said to tell you she'd be here when you wanted to see her. She said she loved you."

For all the practice he'd had, Seth could be a pathetic liar sometimes.

Ryan closed his eyes. He knew Dawn had probably begged Seth to let her see Ryan so he could help her in some way.

He knew Dawn would never say she loved him, especially not to someone she didn't even know.

It would only hurt him to have it confirmed, though, so he nodded. "Thanks," he said.

He knew Seth was trying to protect him from the fact that even on such a day, Dawn couldn't stop thinking about herself, and he was grateful for his friend.

"I'll call her when… you know." _Never._

Seth nodded as if he, too, was reading between the lines.

Maybe he did, at that. After all, they knew each other well enough to know when they were full of shit.

They just didn't often choose to say it out loud.

Ryan stiffly got to his feet. "I'll call."

Seth met his eyes then, serious, and Ryan added, "I will."

He wouldn't lie about that.

Seth nodded, convinced. "Okay."

At the door, Ryan turned back. "Thanks," he told Seth.

_For lying to me._

_For letting me go when I need to without throwing a fit._

_For staying here with me, when Summer must have needed you too._

He expected a glib answer, a quick joke. Seth surprised him. "That's what friends are for."

_Thanks for being my friend, then._

Ryan waved at him and walked away.

* * *

end 


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